Cary Grant was one of those rather famous underground gays that most Americans loved as long as he never got too explicit about where his heart went. We have always tolerated gays, bisexuals, and trans (gendered and dressing) people as long as they kept it away from Christmas dinner and granny who probable knew more about "alternate lifestyles" than we give her credit for. But there is a movement in this country that we should really not ignore.
Gays are being granted the right to marry.
This is kind of a big deal. I certainly never expected to see it in my lifetime. And yet, I found myself living in the first state (Massachusetts) to grant that privilege. Not only that, but I lived in Cambridge which opened its doors at City Hall at midnight on the first day gay marriage was legal to welcome gay couples who wanted to make their relationships formal and public. The outpouring of support and sloppy romanticism was completely wonderful.
In a way, marriage is a rather silly thing to pursue: it's a dying art. Fewer and fewer people practice it. But in many other ways, it is one of the most important avenues toward equality that same sex couples have. Like interracial couples before them, they are fighting for some extremely basic rights. The right to visit each other in a hospital. The right to create a family. The right to have a partner who has more of a voice than a bigoted parent or sibling.
There are people in this country who have been granted civil unions who have found little benefit from that status. So marriage becomes a goal that perhaps has even more meaning than it might for straight couples in this day and age. Many institutions refuse to acknowledge gay partnerships and hide behind that one term that excludes them: spouse.
That a person you chose to live twenty years with, to create a home with, and often have a family with, could still find doors slammed in his or her face if you were sick or dying is absolutely disgusting. It shames us as a nation.
This year, in a very close race between our two major parties, the GOP and the DNC have gone in completely opposite directions. The GOP has declared that all people deserve respect and the DNC has declared that a specific group of people deserve protection. That really isn't just semantics.
Romney has declared that he would repeal DADT and would defend DOMA: one of the least defensible and most expensive federal initiatives in the lifetime of anyone alive today.
There is a very clear difference in these two parties' platforms. Neither one pledges outright support for our LGBT brothers and sisters, but one of them pledges not to try to destroy them.
I know which one I will be voting for.
